Finally.....

I realised tht how insecure I am towards to people. I dun understand wen the 1st place wert is wrong... we talked earlier on the phone. I thought about letting u understand the person in me. u said u wan to knw more and understand me. but then wen i let u knw, u tend to have the wrong msg.

I dint realised tht u got it all wrong till i read the blog of urs. u kept claiming i aint loving u enuf. u claim i dun giv u the whole me. not even a 50%. do u think tht love cn be a measurement? u asked me to care for u more. i wish to but i think i failed. u asked me how deep my love is there for u.. i told u we wont be candle burning from 2 ends. yes its true i am saying i wouldn tell u tht i love u as deep as sea nor higher then mountain. tht is all sweet talking. i aint gonna do tht towards u. as it will only be a saying.
u asked me if i like u... i say no.. cos i do love u. but then came to my notice u judge me. u say u were diff from all the gals i knw. but then u dint realise, now u r exactly like them. u send me into death sentence wif out seeing both understanding of situation.

i perhaps should be upset, i should be crying by now. i jst dint knw why i dint. in fact i feel dissapointed, dissapointed in u do not understand me on wert i was thinking.

if quek and ur ex can give u more on wert u wan, den i am so sorry tht i came in between, den let me be the one whom step aside. but then again i do love u. YUKI CHUN ! do u hear me?

I dunno wert m I thinking lately.... MY brain dun seems to work and yet my mentally spirit is really really low... Maybe due to sleepless nights..havent been sleeping real nice and deep for dis pass a week...

You told me tht u felt lack of love, tht u dun have faith in me. Well, if tht is so i felt better v give each other a break. to be honest, i dunno. Maybe she loves u more den I do. She gaves u everything u need to feel... U kept asking me if I love u..I couldn find the words to convince u.. I dunno perhaps I do everything by action...

I duno have to show nor say wenever I show my action. I dun think there is a need in tht. To me I think, everything jst need to be silently..

I got upset wen i noe it. but wert can i do if thts wert u think.. if the way i am loving u is wrong den let me knw wert is the right way to loves u...

yuki, i am really tired i dunno wert to do anymore......

Recently I am clueless and frustrated. I have alot of stuff to think about and yet a lil time to manage them.

I have finished my 4 eps project another 9 eps I am passing it to Syilah.. SAD but relief actually. I am jst nt really ready yet. 2 sundays i have been working my ass out.. wen can i get a real nice break and holiday??

I wan2 lay back, relax and watch TV the whole day.. listen to some songs and den get myself to the mall without need to think wat time izzit...

I finally cut my hair shorter well, its been a week ago I cut my hair..















(U) picture of me wif my new hair style
(D) Me and Cynthia (my sis)




You kept asking me if I love u? If I really do love u? u say u wan2 know, but I never know in return, Do u really love me... and able to accept the bad and good side of me... wert if I am cacat cannot walk or etc* touchwood* will u still love me?

If only...

I am feeling sick.. my eyes sore, as well as my throat. but it couldn beat the pain in the heart. I feel damn useless wen I couldnt say the things I wanted to. Ended up I only make situation worst. Yeay I knw, thts me.

My heart guilt and pain overwhelmed by the jealousy I guess. Oh bothers...All I can do is wish I make a wise decision by letting her off. Though I do love her. But I cant let eveything hanging can I, I am happy wen she show she cares for me, she misses. tht sweet melodies... NONE will understand. But then I felt like I m a third party. Eventhough thr is no relationship going on in between us..

As I promised to Jess I went to supperclub after work. I am very tired. Like I mention, every part of me is aching and soring.. But thinking I make a promised. So I went.

Well, alot people is thr. I can see Vantric, Xiao Bao, Xiao Ba, Xiao Xin, Black, n yesh Devil is thr as well... Ishk...Its nt tht I hated her. Its only I think tht she couldn be trust. I dun mind if she is nt paying me my RM 50. its only 50. I can tk it as a treat to u. But problem is you promised but then wen its time for u to pay me up u kept giving excuces. I dun mind if u tell me tht u have no money to pay.. but then jst be honest to kept telling me this n tht.

I send selyn back. haha dint knw I could be able to see her thr. She is afraid tht she will be in trouble. I understand her fear wen she knws her driver took drugs..

I wan2 go and tk a nap. Its sunday, and yesh.... I HAVE TO WORK..*applause*

My special Dedication... just for u

yup... I simply love this songs alot... wanted to share it wif u...


We were both young, when I first saw you.
I close my eyes and the flashback starts-
I'm standing there, on a balcony in summer air.

I see the lights; see the party, the ball gowns.
I see you make your way through the crowd-
and say hello, little did I know...

That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles-
And my daddy said "stay away from Juliet"-
And I was crying on the staircase-
begging you please don't go...
And I said...

Romeo take me somewhere, we can be alone.
I'll be waiting; all there's left to do is run.
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess,
It's a love story, baby, just say yes.

So I sneak out to the garden to see you.
We keep quiet, because we're dead if they knew-
So close your eyes... escape this town for a little while.
Oh, Oh.

Cause you were Romeo - I was a scarlet letter,
And my daddy said "stay away from Juliet" -
but you were everything to me-
I was begging you, please don't go-
And I said...

Romeo take me somewhere, we can be alone.
I'll be waiting; all there's left to do is run.
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess.
It's a love story, baby, just say yes-

Romeo save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel.
This love is difficult, but it's real.
Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess.
It's a love story, baby, just say yes.
Oh, Oh.

I got tired of waiting.
Wondering if you were ever coming around.
My faith in you was fading-
When I met you on the outskirts of town.
And I said...

Romeo save me, I've been feeling so alone.
I keep waiting, for you but you never come.
Is this in my head, I don't know what to think-
He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said...

Marry me Juliet, you'll never have to be alone.
I love you, and that's all I really know.
I talked to your dad -- go pick out a white dress
It's a love story, baby just say... yes.
Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh.

'cause we were both young when I first saw you
PS: I miss u ><

LAGUNA and thy attempts

Well, after back from Laguna I started online project. Damn I am so stressed out almost cried.

But however 3 days 2 nights in Laguna is very relaxing.. 1st day wen arrive I only sleep.. zzz.. cos very tired. and den we went for BBQ buffet dinner. Food thr is nt as good as I expeccted. Den we went for a walk before going back to my room to receive tortured.. They wan2 make me drunk. 1st attempt. Fail!!! thy got blur before I do.

2nd day...

Val shock me went she tries to wake me up. Went i open my eyes, her face is only 3 to 5 cm away from mine. I str8 away turn my body around to another side and scream.lolx. den she hugged me from the back and den asleep for a few mins then wake up and prepare to go for breakfast.

Went to Marine Park after breakfast. Snorkelling... beautiful fishes....and corals... but then got a few cuts on my knees due to the dead corals.

after tht went back to Laguna get a shower and den go for lunch, and after tht wen to deep sea to snorkel again... yerrr i wan2 go scuba... so bad.. but its expensive na.. RM 160 just for equip.. wait wait till i keep enuff 1st next time.

its a tired day, came back for dinner den again thy do 2nd attempt to attack me... and guess wert since i cant stand beer... i think 2 and the half i KO. congrats.. I only remember I refuse to go breakfast the next day.. lolx...

but then now its only a memory...la~la~la~... GAMBATTE CASS~ stand up and face the challange.. I CAN DO IT. SO DO U, YUKI.. GAMBATTE ok ok.. wait till u finish exam and come back we go kai kai...and hug u tightly ^^